The worst journey ever!

Hi everyone!

I finally made it to NZ after a very long and very annoying journey. I got to heathrow at around 6.30am (woke up at 4am…eurgh!) and checked in all my bags etc. At check in, I discovered that my flight was also due to stop off at Dubai…thankyou ‘holiday genie’ for informing me of this before I got into checkin (I was under the impression I was just going through Brunei from my ‘updated’ itinary). I then said goodbye to my very tired looking mum and did all the security/hanging around until I got on the plane to Dubai with Brunei Airlines. The journey started well, until about 5mins in when the plane was grounded for an hour. When we took off, it was fine, until about 20mins into the flight, when Thomas, the guy next door, and myself were informed that our TVs did not work. Hmmm, 15 hours until Brunei where we change planes with no films, games, entertainment to be had… Just a quick shout out to all my friends who said ‘don’t worry, you will be fine on long haul! Just sleep and watch a few films!!’

The first leg was ok. I listened to some music and read a bit until we got to Dubai…6 hours down. When we got off at Dubai we could leave stuff on the plane and it was simply the case of getting off the plane, walking to the other side of the airport, going through security, walking back, and getting on the plane again. It was really muggy and hot, but it was so good to get off that plane for an hour. Thomas and I were not looking forward to entertaining ourselves for another 7 hours until Brunei, however I also discovered from Thomas (who went with a travel company who actually tells you whats going on) that I also had to go via Australia. Great! Another stop off. So we got back on the plane for the worst leg probably. I really started to suffer when it was getting dark and everyone was snuggling up to watch a good film and drift off to sleep. I couldn’t sleep and the more I tried and failed, the more I annoyed I got about my unfair situation…I mean, forgods sake! How can they get away with giving me a seat which is broken?! So me and Thomas tried with all out might to get an upgrade to business class, but failed on the basis that it was a full flight. So, there was nothing we could do except fume, deface inflight magazines and moan at every opportunity to the very smiley, enthusiastic cabin crew (oh an also our call buttons didn’t work so whenever we wanted something we had to get there attention and wait about 20mins until they could be arsed to come over).

I was so glad when we arrived in Brunei. I was literally about to go on a murderous spree around the cabin. I think Thomas would have joined me on that one. Finally we could get off the plane to a new one where I can watch some films…I bet you can tell what happens next!

So we got off at Brunei. It was also quite hot and we left the plane, went through security, and got back on again. I was in a completely new seat this time and I was happily moaning to the guy next to me about not having a working terminal and how I was so glad to be nearly halfway there. And then when the plane took off, my worst fears were realised because as I turned on my terminal and sat down to watch The Timetravellers Wife, I realised that everything sounded a little…strange, i.e I could hear all the music but their voices were fuzzy and I couldnt hear them. So I called a cabin crew person over (literally, because my buzzer didn’t work again) and requested some new headphones. I wasn’t panicking just yet, I was trying to stay calm and hope it was just the headphones. However, as you have probably guessed, it was not the headphones, it was the sodding terminal and I was on the warpath. What kind of crappy airline sits someone on a plane for 30 hours with nothing working? I demanded my seat be changed before they fobbed me off with another ‘oh I will just restart your terminal for you, it normally takes about half an hour’. Yeah right. So about half an hour later they located a new seat…possibly the worst seat ever. Squeezed in between two people in, what felt like, the hottest part of the cabin because it was near all the food being cooked. However the terminal worked happily for about 45mins…UNTIL IT BROKE!! I then gave up, took two aspirin and tried to sleep. When I woke up and found it still not working I stormed back to the original seat, which was also a lot cooler, and chatted with the friendly person next to me and waited for the cabin crew to come past so I could have a go at them and push myself to business class…this obviously didn’t work, but entertained me for a while. I am glad we didn’t have any darkness too because that’s when it is most boring. I saw Thomas every now and again who was sitting in a different seat and he was lucky enough to have a working terminal this time around.

We finally got to Brisbane, but just before, I was soaked in orange juice…thankyou royal Brunei, you bunch of absolute *****. At least when I arrived I could now say I have been to yet another country I guess. I think this was the stage when I started going slightly demented, and probably looked it, because going through security, a female came up to me, whispered in my ear ‘can you come this way please’ and two men came out of nowhere and escorted me into a secure room. Yey, maybe Brunei airways have planted a stash on me so I cant get back on the plane. However, it was just an random explosives test and they let me go without any rubber glove treatment. Still, they in no way put me at ease until the very last minute and made it all seem as dramatic as possible to make me a nervous wreck.

So I got back on the final hurdle. Only 4hours until Auckland. As soon as I got on the plane, I asked if there where any spare seat from people leaving at Brisben. Luckily lots of people had so I ended up having two seats to myself AND a working terminal. I nearly had a heart attack I was in such ecstasy! This leg of the flight was fine. I ate my eighth and last inflight meal (god that was another thing, I was so bloated it was umbelievable…the food was very stodgy), watched a film and finally arrived in Auckland after a total of about 30 + hours since leaving Wiltshire. Going through security was a nightmare though because New Zealanders love their bio-security. Going through border control the guy was being a complete knob too. “So, why are you in New Zealand? Why are you travelling on your own? That’s a bit boring isn’t it? Why are you doing that?” After what felt like a few minutes of him having a go at me with a series of cutting rhetorical questions, he sent me off to ‘section 4’. Great. Everyone else was going to section 1. So everyone was looking at me wheeling my trolley around all the empty cue lines for about half an hour like a tit. I then got to the people who had been waiting for me ( I had a code ‘TH’ apparently) and they then discussed something between themselves. They then informed me I had been sent to the wrong place. Great. Now to reverse out of all the cue lines like a knob.

Bio security involved me having my bag taken apart and my hiking boots washed (I had already declared them though so no fines for me). And then I was freeeeeeee.

I met Thomas outside because he also had an internal flight to get from auckalnd. We went to the domestic terminal (after about a 20mins walk), had a drink and then I had a little wash and changed my stinky, orangey clothes. It felt so good! I then said goodbye to Thomas and got on my flight to Wellington…which was a really good flight. The seats where comfier than the long haul Royal Brunei ones! My Uncle was waiting for me at arrivals – never been so glad to see anyone I know in all my life! It finally started sinking in that I had actually made it alive! It was 8am when I arrived and I spent the day settling into my auntie and uncles house. Jack, their son, gave me a big cuddle when he got back from school and we then went to the beach which is about 20 meters from the house. The sun was out, and it looked amazing. It made all the hassle from before seem worth it! I slept like a log at about 7pm though.

Today is weds and I have just taken jack to school. My Uncle Chris has had to go back to England for 5 weeks so I am going to chill here with Lizzie and Jack. The scenery here is amazing and the beach is awesome. It’s a bit cloudy today, but I can still see Kapati island in the distance. My timezones are still a bit confused so I am just going to chill out today. Jack has a touch rugby tournament later which should be funny to watch.

Anyway, hopefully my blogs wont be as long from now! I had to get how seriously bad my journey was with Royal Brunei. I definitely regret not having a stop over now. Noooo, in three months, I will have to do it all over again!!!

Tags: New Zealand, Royal Brunei, travel